1. 345
Well it's 3, 4, 5
Managed to stay alive
Another day at the office
Doing blah-ditty-blah
Gotta get on a train
Before it drives me insane
Pour a glass, pass the gas
Say "no never again"
Yeah it's 1, 2, 3
No day job for me
Shoulda left you a year ago
Gone out and been free
But I was one of the bunch
I was taken to lunch
And now my pay check cleared
And my weed man's comin to town.
2. ALL OVER AGAIN
I knew what I was leaving when I set off in new directions.
The city smog at my back, and on my back I carried my imperfections.
I can't keep givin like a taker, there is no sense in faking contentment.
It's only leading to a bitter pill and I can't stand the taste of resentment.
Yeah I came at this city the wrong way.
So I'm going to come back, yeah I'm taking the long way.
Close the old book, pick up a new pen.
We can start it all over again.
Well Little Chas and Chrissy they been fuckin' it up in the bathrooms.
Chrissy's an automaker's heir, a millionaire, and she ain't nothin but bad news.
And Chas is pushin e-pills since he claimed independence
But a word is just a word without the rest of the sentence
And a sentence is all that you're spending
Cuz the conductor and the cops say that your trip is ending.
Yeah I came at this city the wrong way.
So I'm going to come back, yeah I'm taking the long way.
Close the old book, pick up a new pen.
We can start it all over again.
When we met I didn't know I'd have to say goodbye to my heartbreak.
Have to toe the line harder, have to say goodbye to my mistakes.
But I done wrecked myself and I broken down
So I'm checking into another town.
You be strong while I'm gone.
I won't be gone very long...
Well I know that it ain't easy putting up with my bad moods and frustrations.
But like a phoenix I am rising past my insecure reservations.
And New York's a tough town, if we make it here then we made it.
And there ain't no one on this train to redemption but I'm still gonna take it.
Yeah I came at this city the wrong way.
So I'm going to come back, yeah I'm taking the long way.
Close the old book, pick up a new pen.
We can start it all over again.
3. HEADLIGHTS
I been traveling thousands of miles, probably more. I been talking with passengers, been chatting with the poor. From the pretty parts to the undersides, from the mountain peaks to the oceansides, with the crazies and the sanes. What more could I ask for?
Oh something. Something's coming after me. I ask the conductor, "slow down," slow down so I can see whatever's coming out of the bushes. I squint, but I don't know, what can it be?
I am a man looking for a woman who can say hello and goodbye without crying.
I watch houses, I pass the fields of crab grass, fast fast, as the black cow's grazing. Living life slow on top of the tracks, I can finally relax, and the scenery's amazing. It's all been lost in a dream. Past the continental divide the river gets wide as the landscape, and the mountains break far down the line. But it will still be some time before the twisted telegraph cables connect your heart to mine.
I am a man looking for a woman who can say hello and goodbye without crying.
But maybe those tears are medicine, like a hard Grand Canyon rain. I never had to work too hard for results, or to feel my pain. And this professional hurter, this up-and-deserter is reminded that sometimes the sweetest cakes take the longest to bake. Til the sugar crystallizes, and the blind man realizes he's been singing lullabies to closed eyes under cloudy skies on every smoke break across forty-eight states.
Yeah the motions are potions in a mystical time and they crash a sinuous passage, they carve a path in the snow. And when followed behind the cut line of trees, the ladies are waiting, all down at their knees. They sing, they want, and fall, and drop the ball. They sleep a sleep of light and dark. They never cry, they always dance, they sing of love in glorious chants. They speak their minds and tie their hair away from faces, so soft and fair. They stand in circles. They sing in streams. They hold onto their steadfast dreams. And I am never satisfied but I am trying.
I am a man looking for a woman who can say hello and goodbye without crying.
I am a man looking for a woman who can say hello. Say hello.
4. TUESDAY
Tuesday
You said Tuesday
You would call me
That was the fourth.
Or fifth.
Tuesday
You said you'd call me
Well, hey it's Tuesday
For whatever it's worth.
It would be like an anniversary
I would pick up and still act surprised.
I would laugh at anything you said to me
And best of all, not see the guilt in your eyes.
On Tuesday
My good news day.
When I pick up, you'll be like,
"See I promised I'd call!"
And one day, on a Tuesday
I will stick up for you
'Cause you came through with it all.
I would be the happiest girl on the block.
You would say things to put me at ease.
Like all your lines weren't full of nonsense and talk.
That you meant all those dreams, those emotional pleas.
Oh please.
I tried to keep you close to my heart.
But you've missed the easiest part.
You'd make it all better if only
You'd admit you don't want to be lonely.
How bout a week from this Tuesday
You pick up your courage and phone me?
5. TURN ON THE LIGHT
Sitting in the dark
Looking for a light-switch
Deep inside my head
Hope that I'm not wishing
For a Methodist magician
Who wishes he were dead.
No someone alive would be absolutely preferable
Somewhat unexpected, yet totally acceptable.
Something totally right when I turn on the light.
There's a gloom in the dustpan
There's a tear in the clouds
And all the silver linings
Are all turning browns
And the birds are all headed south
And I can't believe what's coming out of my mouth.
I'm a peasant, presently mining for gold
And I haven't lived a lot, but I'm feeling pretty old
Every day all I see are these mediocre sights.
Won't something extraordinary happen when I turn on the light?
But it's nice in the dark
And I can't see my hands
I write page after page
To a far away land
If I planned this then I'd be mad.
But I'm making it up
So it ain't so bad.
And I wanna see you
But I don't wanna seem like I need to.
Yeah I wanna see you
But I don't wanna seem like I need to.
And I wonder why
I was made to watch the parade
When I should be up front
Setting the pace
And I dream of the day
When I hold truth, victorious.
Never feel lazy,
And the room holds more of us.
Never feeling lazy
And the room holds more of us.
But sometimes I gotta fight.
Just to turn on the light.
6. POISON
Heath Ledger found dead in Soho.
I'm on a train to Toronto.
I saw him in a movie last month
Playing one-seventh of my hero.
His part I never wanted.
He had a troubling relationship.
He had visitation rights.
And that's ugly any way you slice it.
But I still wanna be a singer.
And I wouldn't mind some kind of celebrity.
But I don't know how a person does that.
And I don't know if it really suits me.
Cuz I have no choice but to be myself.
The fake wizards have shown their faces.
And they've moved to the Hollywood Hills,
The Louisiana Bayou, the Saratoga Races.
I don't wanna die with poison.
I don't wanna be Bobby D or Mel Torme.
I wanna be Allen Ginsburg
But instead I howl, "who's to blame?"
The president's to blame.
And Goliath is to blame.
And my parents are to blame.
No, I don't wanna die with poison.
Boil over like a short pot of pasta.
I wanna be like Albert Einstein.
Be respected cuz I use my noodle.
(Relatively speaking, if you know what I mean.)
Some people don't show their cards
And that adds to their level of mystique.
But I don't think that would do me any good.
And I don't wanna hide I think it's weak.
I don't wanna die with poison.
I don't wanna be Bobby D or Mel Torme.
I just wanna write my songs, yeah.
I just wanna play music on a stage.
(By the way I love my parents.)
I just wanna play music on a stage.
7. ANGEL OF FORGIVENESS
Little calling cards for the Angel of Forgiveness.
Little calling cards for the Angel of Forgiveness.
Little trumpet blasts for the Angel of Forgiveness.
Waiting for a message from the Angel of Forgiveness.
I'm leaving love letters all over this country.
Just like Johnny Appleseed.
I keep dreaming of the smoky gambling hall downtown
But I ain't got no money, and nobody speaks my language.
You will not find the real man in the ruins
No matter how deep you dig
So squeeze your stone, and build your ladder.
8. BIG BROTHER
It's a big city, big brother.
You shouldn't stay here
Just to say that you did.
You've got big problems,
And nothing in the till.
And there's not enough solution
In your little magic pill.
Well our father walked the same road, so many times before.
And fought those demons tooth and nail every single day.
And you know you can fight them too.
Just put up your dukes.
And know that no one will blame you if they don't go away.
It's a big city...
I can knock on your door, and call you every morning.
And tell you everything will be okay one more time.
You can tell me that you're better
That the worst of it is over.
And I can nod my head pretending you never lie.
Yeah, you can pull all the wool up over your eyes.
But big brother, I can see you when you cry.
And the well's run dry.
It's a big city....
Please don't make the same mistakes our grandmother did.
Oh, big brother, don't be such a little kid.
9. EPIPHANY
I search the alleys and underpasses for an ounce of truth.
I ate a free meal yesterday - it fueled my paranoia.
My love is San Francisco, but my heart is New York.
Why can't heart and love be closer than further apart?
I travel far for that which I come home to reclaim.
But I do not know my name.
I do not have a home.
I cannot feel my feelings.
I have no hands to fold.
My hidden face is burnt.
My outward face is grim.
My life is an epiphany.
I do not seek to win.
I do not have a reason.
I only have a muse.
I thought that I could keep her.
But all I do is lose.
Now all I have are reasons.
And all I sing are blues.
What confusion I feel.
I want to be here.
And I want to be free.
But all I know are trains and home.
10. BREAKUP SONG FOR BROOK PRIDEMORE TO SING
I have an anxious heart
But I keep on taggin these walls
Keep singing songs
Sometimes even answer your calls
I'm hooked on you, it's true
Like a too big bottle of too strong booze
You're love sure takes a bite.
And I'm letting ya go cuz yer holdin' on too tight.
I wander and I wonder
How you keep on stealing my thunder
And excitement
Even though I'm 14 states away
You're state of mind is kind
When we're close but not
When we're on opposite sides of the night.
And I'm letting ya go cuz yer holdin' on too tight.
I got a letter in my pocket
That I keep forgetting to send
In this fight to the death is this the beginning
Or is it the beginning of the end?
Me I'm like my Dad.
Keepin it close to the vest
Trying to keep the peace
Wherever I rest (well I guess)
You can keep the baby
When we sever all our limbs
And tell your friends on the gravy train
You fell for Jack or Jim
He's a lawyer, and adores ya
Plus the wandering minstrel wasn't so bright
I'm letting ya go cuz yer holdin' on too tight.
We're driving cross the plains tonight
The dust it dries my throat
And I can't keep myself from hittin the bottle
If it helps me hit the notes
And I can't cry on the phone
When there's tears enough for two
Oh baby, they're all coming from you.
You're on the Upper East Side turning into a yuppie.
As you order a Venti and you play with a Puppy
Me I'm down in Florence with a dozen punk rock girls
And it's probably wrong, but they know every song
And they dress like Leatherettes
And they like to trade cassettes
And when I buy the cigarettes they buy the light.
I'm letting ya go cuz you're holding on too tight.
I'm letting ya go cuz you're holding on too tight.
11. WHATCHA GONNA DO
Whatcha gonna do when you're back in the city
When your back's to the wall
And the wall's about to fall down?
Whatcha gonna do when your back's to the wall?
The ghosts come a-knockin, tell me,
Who ya gonna call?
Piano bars, theatre people, musicals, no money, jobby job, bookstore, sidewalk, same old, something else unknown, move away, miss my friends, they ask me when the train ends...
Restaurants, waitin tables, education, be a hobo, be a druggie, rem it, wash a dish, sell my body, who would want it, free downloads, sell my story to the tabloids.
I'm ready to go, ready to fight, I'm ready now
Start up the day, end of the night, I'm ready now
Gonna come up, gonna get high, I'm ready now
Blowing my top, touching the sky, I'm ready now
Inspiration, education, national unification, whiskey bottles, happy landing, always sitting when you're standing, group think, think tank, scene survey, make band, lose lists, make debt, have you seen the train yet?
Halfway, a little rocky, lotsa options, nothing's shocking, new city, same scene, losing money, bad dreams, feeling lonely, peanut butter jelly time, make another, eat an apple, pass the bottle, sleeping bag, find a hostel. Hostel people should be peaceful but they seem like hostile people.
Coffee morning, hot shower, no maps, here I cower, writing books like I was Burroughs, trying to be my heroes: Uncle Joe, Uncle George, Uncle Jimmy, Mother Devlin, Woody Guthrie, Ann Landers, CS Lewis, Alexander, Irish Whiskey, Michael Chabon, Asher Everett, Eggs and Bacon, Herman Melville, Stephen Sondheim, Rodgers, Hart and Hammerstein...
South Park, Thomas Wolff, Thomas Paine, The Persian Gulf, Happy Traum, Meet The Beatles, Anne Frank, Don Cheadle, Ugly Duckling Frank Loesser, Tea Parties, Elvis Presley, Billy Joel in the 80's, Trojan Magnums, little babies, plane crashes, people running, dusty shelves, second comings, second helpings, veggie rabbits, fat cats, little habits, thick patchouli, Toby Goodshank, Dan and Julie.
12. RACHEL
Rachel, Angel
I have a question.
I'm not good at saying things aloud.
But lately, Rachel
I have not been sleeping so well.
Truth is I don't dream of anything.
But there's one thing I know
You already own me.
And there's one thing I feel
I've never been home.
Rachel, Angel
Back to my question:
Will you always let me be myself?
Even though I'm not sure
What that is today love.
And truth is I may never ever know.
But there's one thing I know
You already own me.
And there's one thing I feel
I've never been home.
Rachel, Angel
I've been searching with no compass.
Will you love me, lost and unafraid?
13. MIXTAPE
So I wrote you this last song and I hope you like it.
14. TAPE RECORDER
In my dream last night I was a tape recorder.
I was a little black and silver Sony tape recorder
I was playing a mixtape for you.
Well I opened with the Four Tops then I put on the Jam.
Then I put my buddy Wolfson on cuz Wolfson's the man.
Yeah I swallowed my pride to play some Alison Krauss
But I know you're only gonna play this mixtape at your house.
In my dream....
Well Side A started so good I pulled out some big guns
I put some Pink Floyd on, setting controls for the sun
Followed up by "Mama, You've Been On My Mind" by Johnny Cash
And then my favorite song "Antenna" by my good friend Lach.
In my dream...
Well you know there comes that time on a mixtape where you gotta take a risk?
Well I put on an eleven minute jam by the String Cheese Incident.
And I knew you wouldn't like it but I knew it would pass
Cuz fast-forwarding a mixtape is a pain in the ass!
In my dream....
Well then you flipped me over, hit play on Side B
To hear some bootleg A Fermata and then a song by me
That I had written about some other girl but you thought
That I had written it about you and I never got caught.
Then I put on some classy stuff like Miss Etta James.
Cuz what's good about a mixtape is the song's aren't all the same
I put some Dan Fishback on there, so what if he's gay?
He can love like anybody else and I like how he played
In my dream....
Well as Side B was going, everything started to slow.
And I realized that my battery power was running low.
But then you opened up my back and made it all okay
When you pumped me full of juice
From a brand new set of Double A's....
Well I finished with a bang, it was very by-the-book.
It was "Sentimental Reasons" sung by good old Sam Cooke.
I left three minutes at the end of Side B just in case
I woke up, and wrote a song about you when I saw your face.
In my dream....
15. 2000 MILES
Well I'm out here two thousand miles from my home.
Feeling further away than if I was overseas.
I got nothing to do, I got no one to know.
But would somebody say Hello to me please.
I don't know why I'm here, I don't know why I'm gone.
But I know in my heart that I sing this here song.
I don't ask you for money, I don't ask you for bread.
I don't ask you to remember the things that I've said.
Your shadows are hiding the sun from my face.
But my eyes are still blinded I can't find my place.
I'm a fake and a fraud, and still you applaud.
I'm a minstrel in hipster's clothing.
In a mystery town I got one thing I know.
I'm gonna knock on some doors til I get me a show.
Can't keep running around from one track to the next
When I ain't got the notion that I'm doing my best.
Here's to ya, New Orleans, here's to Charlotte and them
Other cities so kindly welcomed me in.
Gave me places, faces, and pillows to lay.
And I say what I mean, I'll help you out someday.
© 2008 Dan Costello Music (BMI). All Rights Reserved.
